Friendships

One can have many friends, family members, business associates in their life. Yet alone. Does this thought strike a chord in you? Many numbers in your contact list, many friends in your FB account, many emails to check in a day... yet the feeling is not as buzzing as it should be. Perhaps people around put on a mask when relating to people... Just functional... superficial...So I asked myself - do I use my true heart when I relate with people around me?

Sometimes people put on a guarded heart. Not because they want to, but because they think they have to. Perhaps they have used their true heart before and people have not cherished it or even trampled over it. That's why they need the space for their wounded heart. It's safer to relate with people at a distance, at least they do not get hurt, yet they may not experience true hearts around them, including their own... but they'll choose the 'safer' choice or so they think?

Time passed... have hearts healed? Perhaps it's not time that'll heal... Perhaps we need a right perspective about carrying our hearts and growing friendships... Friendships don't always go the way we hope they'll go, or do they?

With some, it takes 10 days to strike up a good friendship. With others, the friendship stays at a functional or superficial level even after 10 years... yet with some others, despite the silence of 10 years, the hearts still connect at a perchance moment...

So do I continue trying, putting in the effort to make friends and make existing friendships grow? I remember someone telling me... in friendships, one should not be 'calculative' on how much each other has given to the friendship...in relationships, it's about giving and receiving, with open hearts. I guess that's true... how to quantify expressions from the heart? Also, sometimes friendships go through a journey... they hit at 'cap' or reach a stalemate at some point in time, and may or may not progress from there.

If we measure friendship from what we can get from people, we may be disappointed. If we measure friendship with the extent people have poured out despite all our human imperfections, we should be contented. If we measure friendship with how far we can go in this journey of friendship, I'd rather not think about it... for who knows?

So what is my resolve and what is my conclusion?

I asked myself... When I'm happiest and saddest, who would I want to talk to? I'm just glad I thought of some friends in my mind. Not many, just some... and I guess that's enough. Yet surprisingly, they are not my chummiest buddies of all... they are people who care for me and will be there for me. History has proven it, fights have pruned it... they are the ones who have seen my weaknesses and imperfections, love me enough to speak into my live and chose to see the flowers that are blooming in my garden, vice versa.

I thank you, my friends... I strive to be a friend to you too!