"ABG! ABG! Now that was what happened... If You don't mind dear God, could You please tell me that earlier? Save the struggle on my part? Ok, I get it, I needed that. Besides, it would not have been called an ambush if You have told me everything earlier.." She recalled what happened to her months ago...
"Where are You God, Your manifested presence, that tangible presence that I used to feel? Why are my times spent with you so... so... unfruitful? I mean I did the usual thing, prayed the usual way, but it's different.. what's happening to me? Have I been faithless?"
She was doing her own thing. Caught up (with the secular needful duties and stuff). And subconsciously she began to also 'do' the 'God things'. God watched. When has He ever slept or slumbered? Psalm121. He watched. His heart was burning passionately for His beloved as He watched.
He decided to launch an ambush. He will have to withdraw to launch the ambush. He will have to be 'invisible' for a while. He has to do this, as He knew just how she is. He sees and hears the cries of her heart for more of God, even before she knew it herself. He springs into action to a heart that says yes. But can His beloved understand? Can His beloved endure? Will His beloved seek Him? Will His beloved run to Him?
"I sleep, but my heart is awake.." ~ Songs5:2
What was that she heard? Accusations. 'So you are checking in on God now. You think He'll hear you? Where were you the whole week?' And the guilt talk went on and on... The beloved's heart was awake, awake to lovesickness... "Where is my lover, where is my Bridegroom God? The accusations are from the pits of hell... help!"
The One in ambush sent His word to His beloved.. "His understanding no one can fathom.." ~ Isa40:28
His beloved lifted up the word, without even knowing God was near. His left hand is under her head (Songs2:6). He has never left her, although she felt as though He did. With the word, she sent the accusation out of sight and out of mind.
"And my heart yearned for him. I arose..." ~ Songs5:4
But His beloved was alone, and lonely. What's happening? How to even begin to tell another what was happening when she herself knew not what was going on? She broke down in tears and exasperation...
But she decided to press in and seek God. Faint with love, eyes squinting with mustard seed faith, she arose as she looked to God. She thought, whom have I in heaven but You? Surely Jesus understands, and too, went through lonely moments of alone-ness. Her thoughts were drawn to the cross. To the garden of Gethsemane... Her tears slowly dried up as the scene and emotions of Jesus at the garden of Gethsemane filled her mind and whole being. Yes, God understands... He went through the loneliest moments on earth.
She fell asleep in weariness and slept soundly... She fell right into the arms of her bridegroom God who loves her and pursues her passionately, even when He had to withdraw His manifest presence to cause her to...
... to cause her to see her own heart that wants more of God! To cause her to realise how much God loves with a deep passion, even in her weakness, and not just 'do' more of the God things to 'earn' back His favour. To cause her to yearn for more of God in response! She exclaimed, "I am dark, but lovely!" Songs1:5. Her heart yearned and longed for more of God... Such love, such God!
"My heart leaped up when he spoke..." ~ Songs5:6
Now everything made sense... "God, you ambushed me! You set me up!" Now she truly KNOWS that He understands, and that He LOVES her unreservedly and passionately even in her weakness. Oh how God answers the prayers of her heart. His ways are not our ways... His thoughts are not our thoughts... they are higher! Isa55:8-9.
"Tell me God," her heart leaping at the revelation of His divine ambush, "tell me, what do I do now? Shall I give up everything to follow you? If you say so!" she exclaims, as her heart responded in passionate lovesickness, mixed with the human fears of needing to give all up, to give up the things she enjoys and loves doing...
And like Abraham, she passed the test. She was willing to give it all. But that was not what God wanted. He wanted to test her heart. Yes, He already knows her heart. He says behold...
And the beloved's journey continued. God sent many angels to refresh her along the way. Angels whose reward are in the hands of God, because of their hearts of love... He also gave her some gifts. Gifts that she knew were from God, and she cherished them. But the greatest reward for the beloved, was the unveiling of God himself to her through this divine ambush. Who is this God? What is His Name? Songs5:10-16...
Indeed, our Bridegroom God is our Joy and Great Reward...
Gen15:1 ~ After these things the word of the LORD came to Abram in a vision, saying, “Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your exceedingly great reward.”
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